I have been struggling more and more with my humanity. Previously I never gave a thought to how much time it would take for a new project I wanted to start. I was like a man who didn't count the cost before building a tower. As I get older (34), and especially this last year, I am thinking more about my time and how it is spent.
With the patience of my wife and the help of Ruanne, I am carving out family days and thinking about others' schedules when I plan mine. My tension is to do this and yet be ready to jump in and help someone who needs it, even when it invades my personal time. Many times Jesus went away by himself, or with his disciples. By doing this, he shows me that I have a need and permission to take time for spiritual renewal. For someone who is always busy doing something, this is a hard thing to learn and practice. Sometimes I fear that I'll become lazy and not accomplish anything, but I guess Jesus accomplished quite a bit so I can to, even with an occasional day off.